This Too Shall Pass is a Sunday Times bestselling book by British psychotherapist Julia Samuel. Drawing on hours of conversations with her patients, it uses 21 stories about everyday people to explore how people can adapt and even thrive through difficult and traumatic change. Its subject matter spans hard times in family, love, work, health and identity.
If you are deciding whether to read the full book, this summary covers what it argues, how it is structured, and where its limits lie.
About the Book and the Author
Julia Samuel is a leading British psychotherapist who spent roughly thirty years working first for the NHS and then in private practice. She is the Founder Patron of Child Bereavement UK.
This Too Shall Pass followed her earlier book Grief Works, which was also a Sunday Times bestseller. The paperback edition was published on 1 April 2021 under the Penguin Life imprint and runs to 368 pages.
One practical note for anyone searching for the title: a novel by Milena Busquets shares the same name. That book is literary fiction about love and grief, not Samuel's psychotherapy work.
The Central Idea: Why Change Is Hard
Samuel starts from a puzzle. Change is the natural order of things, yet many people struggle with life's milestones, from first jobs and first loves to children leaving home and retirement.
Her framing adds a modern complication: we live in a culture of limitless choice, which makes life more complex than ever. When every option seems open, even ordinary transitions can feel like failures of judgment rather than normal passages.
The book's response is not to promise that change becomes easy. It argues that people can learn to adapt and even thrive as a result of their most difficult and traumatic experiences. The aim is to help readers navigate changes everyone will face sooner or later.
Key Themes Across the Stories
The 21 stories are not a single continuous narrative. They are portraits of people at transitional moments, and the book ranges across several areas of life.
Family and Parenthood
A woman readjusts to work after maternity leave, and a single father handles a serious medical diagnosis. Another mother struggles with the decision to return to work.
Love and Relationships
One story follows a woman deciding whether to leave her husband for a younger lover. The book is described as compassionate and gentle, yet firmly on the side of building sustainable and satisfying relationships even when they have gone wrong.
Work and Identity
A woman starts over after losing her job. A young man deals with the aftermath of coming out. A Telegraph review groups these under the transitional moments of life: falling in love, the birth of a child, illness, the loss of a job and a shifting sense of self.
Health, Loss and Hard Change
The publisher describes the book as aimed at anyone experiencing the pain of change, from divorce to debilitating illness. Grief and bereavement run through the material, which is unsurprising given Samuel's background in bereavement support.
How the Book Is Told
The method is the book's distinguishing feature. Samuel builds each chapter around a patient's experience rather than around a technique or a numbered step.
A Times review by Kate Saunders noted that the case studies are presented so well that they often read like good fiction. The publisher describes the stories as coming from the therapy room and lighting the way for the rest of us.
The narrative is framed by research. The book is described as illuminated by the latest social and psychological research, though the sources here do not detail which studies are cited.
What Reviewers Said
Reception has been broadly warm, with reviewers emphasizing tone over tactics.
A Daily Mail review by Bel Mooney argued the book is emphatically not a self-help book but a celebration of the strength of the human spirit. Christina Patterson, writing in the Sunday Times, called it full of compassionate wisdom and a rich, wise book. The publisher also presents it as a comforting and enlightening read.
That framing matters for expectations. Readers looking for worksheets and exercises will find something closer to accumulated clinical observation.
Main Takeaways
Because the book works through stories rather than a prescribed programme, its lessons are themes rather than instructions.
- Change is normal, but struggle is normal too. The book treats difficulty with transitions as a common human response rather than a personal defect.
- Choice can burden as much as free. Limitless options make modern transitions harder to read and harder to accept.
- Adaptation is possible. Samuel's stated focus is on learning to adapt, and in some cases thrive, after hard experiences.
- Relationships are worth repairing. The book's stance is that sustainable, satisfying relationships deserve effort even after they have gone wrong.
- Stories help. Seeing how others navigated a transition can make your own feel less isolating.
What a Summary Cannot Replace
A summary can convey the argument, the themes and the reception. It cannot reproduce the book's main asset: the patient stories told at length, with the texture that makes them read like fiction.
It also cannot supply details the available sources do not cover. There is no chapter-by-chapter breakdown here, no full list of all 21 stories, and no detailed account of the research the book draws on. Samuel's specific clinical guidance, where it appears, is best read in the original.
Who the Book May Suit
This Too Shall Pass is likely to appeal to general readers interested in how people cope with change, loss and transition, and to readers who prefer narrative and case material over structured self-help exercises.
It may suit you if:
- You are going through a transition such as a job loss, a relationship ending, a new baby or a diagnosis, and want company rather than a checklist.
- You have read Grief Works and want Samuel's follow-up.
- You want a book that is compassionate in tone without being soft on the difficulty of change.
It may suit you less if:
- You want a step-by-step programme to work through. The book is characterized as not a self-help manual.
- You want a clinical or academic text. The framing is aimed at general readers navigating life changes.
Conclusion
This Too Shall Pass is a story-driven exploration of how people move through change, written by a psychotherapist with decades of practice behind her. Its core message is that change is inevitable, struggle is understandable, and adaptation is possible.
Read it in full if you want the stories and the accumulated detail. Use this summary if you want the map before you decide.
